today the sun is shining brightly and it is time to move on....and smile a little smile.
as some of you know, i have begun my qi gong classes over the weekend. hey, before all of you start running away, thinking that this is another old fobbie's post on the most boring art of qi gong, i hasten to add that it is really an amazing experience.
stay a little while.
like many, i used to think that qi gong was for the oldies and usually some image will pop up of grand-daddies and grand-mummies moving slow-mo in tune to some silent dance steps. i'm not quite sure whether my line of thinking has changed.....or maybe i am now finally qualified to join the oldies but goodies group *holds placard up instructing readers that this is where they shout 'of course not'*
anyway, this little cynic joined the class with an open mind and hopefully, at the end of this 12- days course, i would have learnt something new. actually, come to think of it, this latest 'cult' group is more my thing since it basically only involves sitting and meditating for 12 straight days. for those who have grown up on a healthy dose of those chinese kungfu series will probably know that this is very much like the times when the sifu has to 'pai kwan leen kung' (i have no idea how to translate that but it's when the master has to go into caves or whatever locked rooms and re-energise himself by simply sitting down and meditating).
and mock not, those cynical disbelievers. it really works. amazing things happen to you simply by sitting there and breathing. before all of you rush out to get yourself a cave, i must tell you that there is a method to the breathing. whilst it is not difficult to learn, it is not easy to practice for all of us must learn to leave our thoughts and desires behind. yes, yes, very good indeed for ms cuckoo head here.
first day:
learning to let go, relax and not have a single thought in your head is veryyyyyy difficult. you keep thinking 'don't think of anything, don't think of anything' and then you realise, hey, that's thinking isn't it?
after several sessions, my mouth started salivating uncontrollably. well, not enough for me to fetch a pail and leave it nearby, but enough to have me gulping down large volume of saliva. whenever i breathe out, i can feel an oppression slightly below my chest area. not heart attack, okay, wise guys. it's the middle dan-tian and you are suppose to feel the 'chi' collecting there. many times i thought i was falling off the chair. sleepiness or entering into the tranquility mode?
second day:
having finally understood the breathing technique, i am now getting better at practising the meditation. during one session, i actually felt ripples going down my back. very pronounced rippling effect. and my friends, it was extremely pleasurable.
someone once told me that when you are able to achieve the final stage, it is equivalent to orgasm (now, you know why i volunteered so eagerly). then again, the person who said it could have been my husband, which immediately brings the question to mind 'what am i doing wrong in bed?' (don't even bother trying to answer that question, pleaseeee!)
i also felt pricking sensations in both of my palms. oh yes, baby, i'm on my way to be a real-deal martial art master. for those who tick me off the wrong way, beware! pretty soon, i'll be able to use my 'chi' to bounce you hundreds of kilometres away.
tonight will be my third class.
pretty soon, i will be learning shaolin moves like 'buddha's hand' and running across the surface of water.
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25 comments:
Good going! :-)
Hey, you did not say how long (duration for each session) you started out meditating... No call of nature meh?? :-P
I've heard great reviews from people who did this... my sister included. She had to quit when somebody tell her it's contradicting to her faith.. hee hee I used to do Tai Chi 24 styles. It's a great exercise too but as with all these breathing exercises, the teacher has to be really qualified. Wrong breathing techniques will do much more harm than good.
after the 12 day course u will be able to get a role in one of shaw bros martial art movies!
wahhhhhh a qi gong master to be... *kowtows to sifu*
pssssst dun forget to teach me the orgasmic bit ya?
dear helen: the sessions started out 5 mins long and i understand that it is supposed to go up all the way to 45mins later on. the classes are 3hours long each night, so in between the talks, we do as many sessions as we can. no call of nature lah, i've got big cc bladder :-)
this qigong is slightly different as it's just meditation, purely breathing, so it's less dangerous. but you are right, a qualified teacher is most important. but the benefits is excellent.
dear wuching: yes, i'm in the midst of negotiating with tvb
dear ff: good disciple. heehee. trust you to only notice that part. you want me to teach you how to hit aeroplane ah?
Heard that too indulgence into those stuff like qi gong, shaolin, tai chi, etc.. may lead you to a state of 'chow foh yap moh'
Better be careful le..
dear licky: in case you haven't notice, i'm already a little chow for yap moh. kekeke. prob won't notice :-) on the plus side, i can save a lot on boat tickets.
walau..si fu si fu..hahaha
this morning, as i was driving to work, i thot of you when i saw the sun shining ever so brightly... :)
any kinda (s)exercise is good for u! ;)
think we could learn how to fly and step lightly on trees, ala crouching tiger hidden dragon?
sigh... would really save time instead of waiting in traffic jams...
Good to see some optimism sipping into you today. Now you make me feel like I need to learn some of those breathing techniques... Teach me when I go back lah...
Breathing techniques? Does that include those heavy breathing during lovemaking sessions ah?
I've been very tempted to sign up with the Vipassana meditation course. Wait! I still like partying better. LOL
dar ang gu gu: yes, good disciple? your name reminds me of how i speak to babies :-)
dear angel: awwww, that's so sweet. :-D
dear may: haha. i'll let you know when i'm able to do that. i'll pick you up with my light flying steps and give you a ride :-)
dear ian: it's really the most amazing thing. last night i had an episode that was similar to orgasm. it was like split second though but really really shiok! kakakaka. unfortunately, i can't teach you because i won't know how to handle it if you 'chow for yap moh'. i can show you where the teacher conducts his regular classes though. you sound like you are truly starting to miss malaysia. you still keeping to your jogging routine?
dear cocka: oooo, this is even more pleasurable. if you know how 'high' you can get with these simple breathing technique, i think you will 'phoke pang pei' (stumble broken nose) to register. more shiok than 'kiu kai' lah. but this is the traditional chinese meditation qigong technique. no guarantee your vipassana one will be as pleasurable.
i hear that if you have really mastered your 'chi' you instinctively let off a big loud fart after each sesion. to let off all the useless and bad 'chi' correct onot?
dear ah pek: only if you have a lot of gas in your body lah. that's why the teacher's first lesson was not to eat garlic, ginger and sweet potatoes. and we always switch on the fan, to keep the air circulating :-D and the aircon, to mask the sound of puuuuuuuuuuttttttt. hahahaha.
me: ginger actually expels gas and soothes an irritated gut. Those gas culprits are: chickpeas, dhal/lentils, baked beans, cabbage.
wahhhh! so informative and serious ker today? no more pulling my leg lah?
yes, lm, we know ginger expels the gas. the problem is we don't really want it all to be expelled during the class. if not, teacher must supply gas mask. can imagine 20 students all letting off at the same time? situation comparable to japan's nerve gas :-D
i learned qi gong before but never really master it. but during the practice i can feel the warmness (or qi you may call it) flowing through the body. laziness won the day and hope i will pick it up again.
as improving sex life i dont know cos i was not married at that time LOL
dear fei: no, you misunderstood. it doesn't improve sex life. it can replace it. hahahahaha. because you get so high, you can 'cow tim' yourself. kakakaka. but i understand that not all so qigong so shiok like mine lah. others quite boring one. this one you can get hooked, quite addictive becos you feel so good.
Yes I miss Malaysia indeed. Let's organise a bloggers' meet. Muahahaha!
dear ian: you'll find a lot of your readers are from spore, so you'll have to travel south, not msia :-D
haiyoh. asking a very big step from me lah, kiddo. rub off some of this cynism off me first, ok? dec is still a long way off. we shall see, ok? :-D
me: I owae serious one wat. like those from the spore or tiny red dot.
dear lm: that sentence was enough to sent me rolling on the floor with laughter. you, serious? harharharharhar.
i've often wondered: are you a red dot citizen or one of us? somehow, you come across as a little of both.
me: I wear red and white but that is only an outer coat. negara ku. oops.
dear lm: why oops? gone too long, have forgotten how to sing the national anthem leh. actually, i've forgotten how to sing both. nevermind, was never too patriotic.
i'm so bored now.....
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