wassup?

he asked how was i doing? i said fine, good.

eventhough the sound of the taoist nun ringing her bell, chanting and performing the funeral rites was enveloping the background. not that great actually. but how do i say it when someone asks casually. it wasn't meant to be an indepth enquiry into my life, just a well-mannered way of opening conversation. or maybe it was. i won't know the difference. still, it feels funny to launch into my life with someone who haven't been in my life for quite a while.

***************

he asked what i have been doing recently. i said nothing much.

mum took a fall, broke her leg and is in wheelchair for the last 6 months. i've been designated relieve household-in-charge. my uncle passed on before the new year was over. never knew i cared. i've spent one week clearing filthy, fungus ridden store rooms with historic artifacts dating back to prehistoric era, with the bruises and muscles to show for it. sometimes i'm working the night shift as well as the morning shift. i've won a car. caught up with friends that i have not seen for 25 years and some i have even forgotten about. the mystery of her drastic weight loss has finally been revealed. but she died before it can be known. i've been through the lows and highs of emotional turmoil last week. i hate it when the phone rings at night. was busy trying to organise son's birthday party last month, what with parents rsvp-ing way after deadline. now busy organising daughter's. 2 birthdays, 2 funerals, 1 wedding, 1 birth last month. am tired. physically and mentally. been nowhere for holiday. haven't touched my dslr for months. am uninspired to take beautiful photographs. haven't visited my friend since last year. her mother called. wants to go over, as soon as this dreaded sore throat is over. but the virus is comfortable in the warm dark cave that is my throat, doesn't want to up and leave. have done spring cleaning in house and got rid of a lot of rubbish, eventhough it is not spring yet. still a lot of rubbish in the house. work pile not getting smaller, will never get smaller. handphone is coming apart on me, but uninspired to adapt to new one. need to get inspiration.

i didn't say any of that.

so, just waiting until the next time you go on holiday?

err.....yes.

seems like a habit how i'm answering these questions.

still, it's easier.