the power of cc

sometimes in the journey of life you discover the little roads and secrets that make life easier. things that people don't or won't tell you about. i don't know why; people should have a little handbook on life, its meaning, guidelines and little hacks but i guess if everybody knows about the cheat sheet, it will not work anymore.

ok, so this week i have discovered how to get someone's attention via email. grab someone by the balls, even if they are not physically equipped with any, and make them sit up and pay attention. in my line of work, i deal with people through email some of the time. however, people have an inclination to just read and move on, not taking the necessary action. i have been guilty of it once or twice, especially when i am checking my email on the move and then when i return to the office, i am too engrossed in catching up with work to remember. i do go through my inbox quite frequently to make sure that i have attended to the things that needed attention so that i am not one of those people who ignore emails.

so, what do you do when your first email has been ignored and there is no response whatsoever, not even a peep, from the recipient? give it a few days, then i forward the same email back to the same person, which quotes the first email and shows when it was first sent. that is the first reminder. a little knock, knock, hello, did you read the email? if that is also ignored, i then send another email, with words a little stronger, just a tiny bit because you don't want to go pissing people off and then you are just black-listed and you can scream till the cows come home and nobody will acknowledge you, but this time, i c.c. it to half a dozen people. people who are in the same company as the recipient and are vaguely related to the case in hand. the marketing department, the finance department, the admin department, the manager, the subordinate, the colleague, and to add a little weight on my side, i also c.c. to my husband. his work is roughly related to mine so it's not like i'm sending a copy to my grandmother, my mother, my daughter or my postman.

that little button near the name of the recipient, it is the holy grail of electronic communication. that is the little trick that makes them sit up and reply in the blink of an eye. because now everybody knows about this and they will know if you are ignoring the email. to be judged by your peers, or your superiors, is a fate worse than death. it is guaranteed to be 100% effective. if the recipient still does not reply, then please take a moment and pray because they must have come across serious grievous injury and are unable to return your email. pick up the phone and call their colleagues to offer them your condolence.

so, people, now you know the secret. go forth and put the power to the use of good. with great power comes great responsibility. 

the oh shit club

welcome to the oh shit club. i am the president of the club, nominated by virtue of my so many oh shit moments. the first and foremost condition will be to endure pain, or not endure pain and exclaim oh shit. like when i sliced off a piece of my thumb. oh shit! like when i fondled the hot iron. oh shit! like when i burned my hand on a hot pan. oh shit! like when i stub my toe on the corner of the sofa leg. oh shit! i'm a very accident-prone lady, it will seem. but to be qualified to be the president of the club, you must be able to walk away nonchalantly and continue with your activity. try to stop the blood gushing forth for like 5 seconds, then wrap a bandage around it and continue chopping. when the bandage is soaked through with blood, change another one. if the food is tainted with some blood, oh well, blood is full of various nutrients i am told (the source of that information could or could not be from me). or when your finger is hurting like crazy after burning it on the hot iron, put a cold pack next to you so that you can alternate between sticking your finger into the ice pack when it is burning with pain and continue to iron when your finger can't tell the pain because it is frozen. we presidents are made of hard core stuff.

i'm looking to retire though. one only has so many fingers, hands and feet to massacre. anybody up for the job?

a dog's life

the dogs bark and are instantly shushed. in the dark corridor there is a device that emits a shrill sound anytime the dogs bark. a sound so high pitched that only the dogs can hear, they say but i can still hear the disturbing screech piercing through my peace and quiet 20 feet away. a little akin to someone screaming deafeningly into your ear whenever you talk i will think, from the dog's point of view. a little cruel i opine. dogs are as dogs go, puppies even more so. it's telling them to be less of a puppy and more of a puppet.

when they had 1 puppy it was all cute and nice. then came the female one to keep him company, and well, propagate. seeing him trying to hump her everywhere they went was a little disturbing i have to say. i will rather they do not do it in front of the dining table when i am trying to have a decent meal.  it's like animal porn - live. then came 3 boisterous playful puppies, making a total of 5 dogs clamouring and scratching at your legs whenever you enter. not to mention the din of their bark at the slightest sound and the jewels they leave everywhere to surprise you and your poor feet. if you have never had a pack of dogs running towards you at full speed, with their sharp claws and over-enthusiastic greeting, it is more than a little intimidating.

we'll take one of the puppies, we thought, thus keeping it pretty much in the family and the parent dogs can still see the pups often. no, they said, it's their first batch of puppies. they can't bear to give it away. which i have to say i understand even though it is biting off more than they can chew (pun intended). only when the pups have outgrown their cuteness and are bigger in size than their parents that they are asking if perhaps we will like to bring one home now. that i cannot understand, or rather i don't think is nice. and no, we cannot have our choice, only the ones that they dislike more. we are not a dumping ground for unwanted puppies so we declined.

now, they are kept tied up in a room. i hear their sad whines occasionally. they have a cat, who has been tied up since birth, to keep them company. the pets have the best care in the world, she says. so much more pampered than those out in the street. a little spa there, a little grooming here and air-conditioning everywhere. i'm not sure if that's what they want or need the most. and a short play time at night so that they will not be too naughty. this is where my jaw drops, leaving my mouth with a gaping hole. playing with puppies do not spoil them, not playing with them drives them crazy with depression. we advise, we hint and we say; they need their freedom. give some away. it's falling on deaf ears. why are we so cruel to lesser beings? imposing our will on them and believing it is in their best interest. if we can't afford the time, why do we take them in? i believe the same can be said of so many parents. people who don't enjoy their children's company, who cannot wait to send them far far away at a very young age in the name of education. people who neither educate nor listen, replacing their time and attention with money. in this day and age with information everywhere, nobody can claim to be ignorant. yet why do we persist to be what we are?