Thursday, October 19, 2006

Gallantry? What's that?

there seems to be a recent epidemic going around. infact, almost all of my readers have been inflicted with this deadly disease, CAMEL (Curiosity About M E’s Looks), which is quite worrisome actually. i am not too definite about the how, why, where and when but i know that there is no known cure. all i can recommend is to take 2 panadol, take lots of rest and fluids and don’t call me in the morning.

this affliction is rather strange actually, since i am no sweet young thing, bobbing and popping away. hello? this is a 35 year-old non-anti-gravity mother-to-2-kids we are talking about. are you expecting a teri hatcher housewife lookalike perhaps? there is nobody perky and bouncy staying here, sorry, you have the wrong door. so, stop being fixated about the way i look and concentrate on the words here. otherwise i will not be showing you my halloween costume. :-p

back to today's topic.

gallantry is dead. i tell you, gallantry is dead!

today started out with a male versus female 'see who can show up the latest' meeting with friends. as usual, i lost by a small margin, no thanks to my watch, which keeps giving me the correct time no matter how much i adjust it. the male sex does not seem to have any misgivings about keeping the ladies waiting nowadays. yes, i know of a blogger who can testify to that! what happened to the days when men should turn up before the ladies, if only so that she won't be all alone in a strange place? gone. the answer is it's gone with the times.

i'm old fashioned perhaps? however, i have not been trained in the art of self-defence and have no confidence that i can outrun the baddies, so it will be nice to see a familiar face around. especially since i was carrying a big box laden with 10 heavy bottles today. which brings me to my second proof of the death of chivalry.

today i was faced with the task of carrying that load two stories up and the darn lift and escalator chose the perfect timing to stop operating. as it was, the load itself was a challenge to my dainty ...*ahem* built but to carry it up, teethering on my heels, up the stupid escalator steps? i freaked out in the middle of the first flight. incase you have forgotten, i am altophobic and yes, i get crazy when i travel up the escalator without holding on to the hand-rail. both hands holding on to that heavy box, i was of course not accorded the comfort of that security. step by step, as my legs shaked and i cursed under my breath, i made my way up. i was so tempted to stop half-way, take out my heels and walk up the steps barefooted. that alone would have been a big enough challenge for me. sigh! why must things that are so easy and simple to others be so hard for freakish me?

as i said, after the first flight, i lost my grip on sanity. there is no way i will do a repeat for the second flight, no matter how much anybody pays me. i rather sit on the nearest stool until rescue comes in the shape of habitually late friends or i rot to death first. so, i planted my bottom on the nearest chair and sat there like an idiot whilst everybody walked by.

not long later, i spotted a security guard...who looked pretty able-bodied to me. not mr muscles, mind you, but i am sure he can manage a tinyyyy box like that up one flight of stairs. so, with my super powers of attraction, i tried to mesmerise the guard into helping me carry that box. of course it cannot be an outright request, you understand; i must make the idea seemed like it came from him.

me: hello, when will the escalator start moving?

guard: soon.

me: ohhhhhhh. this box is tooooo heavy for me to carry upstairs. *pouting slightly*

guard: *smiles and walk off*

me: !!!!!!!!!!!

this guy must be really dense, otherwise my charisma must be on leave today. so, this idiot sat there, whilst more strangers gawked as they walked by, until the escalator was switched back on. infact, one nosy man actually walked closer to sneak a peek as to the contents of the box. sheesh! chivalry 0, nosy busybodies 1.

i tell you, gallantry is dead!

12 comments:

may said...

when you least expect it, there still are those very very rare moments of chivalry that brings a smile to the recipient of such act. hmmm... just need to find more of those!

can't blame them when some feminists refuse to be helped too, thus killing need for such gallantry. spoil market!! (sorry, don't mean to point fingers)

Jonzz said...

Awww, no one helped you. Tsk... tsk... tsk... that's one cold building.

The moral of a story is: when you talk to a gentleman, then you can use the 'ask a gentleman approach'. When you talk to a dense-tleman, you must use the 'Excuse me leng chai, can you please help me carry this box upstairs *wink* *wink* *wink* *pout*.

Don't speak in riddles. You will only confuse them in which they smile and walk away.

Las montaƱas said...

must be the ME carrying the 'atas' look lah..

Fantasy "Sticky" Flier said...

I'll say its the feminist movement thats at fault. I've tried helping in the past but all I get is a thankless look for helping, not even a smile. Besides nowadays cannot anyhow help people. Wait if accidently drop the box, break the bottles then kena sue how?

Cocka Doodle said...

Next time try wearing plunging neckline and your super-duper makes "mountain out of molehills" push-up bra lah. Sure guarantee a lot of mah latt lous will offer to assist wan.

me said...

dear jonzz: brrrrr..yeh! but i very honest one. he not leng chai at all, how to call him leng chai leh? :-)

dear may: really? must be rare and far between. gentleman, where r uuuuuuuu? u mean got women refuse ppl to open door, pull out chair and hold door open for them meh? i sure won't reject a friend offering to hold something heavy for me.

dear monty: moi? i very humble one :-p

dear ff: really ah? those are not feminists. those are arrogant rude dense idiots. be it male or female, any assistance should be rewarded with a thank you and a smile. but then hor, if u drop my bottles, i sure sue one. kakakaka.

dear cocka: haiyoh! like that, everybody gather around to pretend helping...but all looking down my blouse and not at the box. free show meh?

ah pek said...

Again I quote,

this is a 35 year-old non-anti-gravity mother-to-2-kids we are talking about. are you expecting a teri hatcher housewife lookalike perhaps?

would man be ever gallant facing you?
You killed all the gallantry. hahahahahaaaaa...
Happy Deepavali.

me said...

dear wuching: got meh? a lot of men walked past without batting an eye leh. i should have pretended to have twisted my ankle, then perhaps someone would have offered their hand

dear ah pek: *takes big pot and hit ah pek on the head* not perky and bouncy, cannot be gentleman meh?

Immomsdaughter said...

Ha ha.. this is so funny at your expense :) Nolah, not all jerks are like that. Lol.

Paula said...

I noticed the same ME. It's not gallantry - it's basic MANNERS. People here don't even get up off their bus seats to allow an elderly person a place to sit or help a pregnant woman with her groceries. It's how we've raised the last generation.. it's all about "What's in it for me?" attitude. Sucks too. Hate it. Stupid.

You find a gentleman with proper manners to open your door and help you - there's a jewel of a man.. particularly because he CHOOSES to help, not because it's expected of him.

ian said...

Generally, men don't take hints... You just have to utter the words,"HOI!! TAKE THEM UP FOR ME!!! IF NOT I'LL KICK YOUR BALLS OFF YOUR GROIN!"

As a natural response of self-defense, his balls might shrink to minimise damage should the threat comes true. Then he might just help you. Might only ok?

LOL!

me said...

dear imd: hehe. just wanted to make you guys smile a little, even if it was at my expense. sometimes it pays to look at things in a comical vein, rather than be all huffy and puffy about it.

dear annie: yes! i don't know how they do it, pretending that they don't see the pregnant lady trying to balance in the bus or the old man shuffling under his tired knees. doesn't these people have conscience? the question perhaps is why did we raise the last generation like that? is it apathy towards nagging our children? or is it super-egoism? if we weren't like that, how did we manage to raise them like that?

dear ian: if a man needs the fear of ball-shrinking to be instilled before he acts, it's not gallantry. we can do the things ourselves, it's just nice if someone offers to do it for us. the act of putting the feelings and wellness of others before him, that's gallantry.

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