Monday, September 25, 2006

of pain and playing

the end of last week saw me being tormented by a very painful mouth ulcer. i never knew pain until that incident, and that coming from someone who has gone through child-birth twice, you can believe that it was severe. it wasn't so much that the pain was graded a 10 on the scale but more because it dragged on for the longest time. can you imagine a pain that lasts 24 hours round the clock for 4 long and endless days? not just one of those dull aches but a searing, head pounding, crippling kind of pain. pain when you try to open your mouth to talk, pain when you don't, pain when you put anything in your mouth, liquid or solid and pain even when you sleep. believe me, i have tried all types of remedy to cure the damn ulcer, short of gargling with acid and rubbing salt onto the wound. external, internal, watermelon, spray, gargling, whatever you may have...it's just a persistent freak. as it was, i spent the earlier part of the weekend mumbling and talking incoherently. the kids, however, sportingly took it as part of a charade game.

on sunday, i attempted something that i have laid aside for a number of years now, eversince the young one was born. playing badminton. notice that i chose the word 'attempted'? that was because the sport pretty much saw me picking up the shuttlecock more than attempting to hit it. perhaps i should rename it to 'pickaton'?

nevertheless, sunday's sport brought a moment of clarity into my life. now i know the reasons i will never be the next legendary rashid sidek. yes, at a fleeting moment in my life, i once dreamt of being a famous sports artiste, revered by many and adored by all. of course, that dream was quick to burst, especially after i failed the physical education test in school. how many people do you know scored a '0' for pull-ups? well, you are indeed honoured to be able to say that now you know at least one.

anyway, back to badminton. i realised that there were several contributory reasons for my not being able to achieve that glorified honour of a badminton champion:

1. my dimunitive physique. there is a reason that short people are not seen standing on the winner's podium. forget about killer smashes, i will be glad not to have a cramp in my neck from all the craning for the shuttlecock. there is only one way for the shuttlecock to come and it is usually from above, so when you are...erm...closer to the ground (that is a politically correct way to say 'short'), you are at an ackward and very tiring angle to catch a glimpse of the feathered thing. when you are at that angle, the light is also usually in your eye, causing you temporarily blindless when the shuttlecock is within the reach of your racket.

2. the damn shuttlecock doesn't drop right into my hand. and that happens 90% of the time. as much as HD tries to aim it straight for my racket, given that he is not a professional player, it has a tendency to fall out of my reach. which is pretty self-explanatory, i think. since it doesn't fall within my reach, there is a very high likelihood that i will miss it, right?

3. heavy leaded legs are not meant for playing badminton. who has heard of players with tons of weights attached to their legs? as much as my brain tells me to run for the shuttlecock, my legs act otherwise. they are pretty much stuck to the floor and there seems to be a delay mechanism, like those in live radio broadcast, attached to the process of telling it to run and the reaction, by which time it is always too late.

4. i blink. way too much. i think it has become a habit to me. everytime the shuttlecock is about to touch the racket, i blink. infact, i don't think i have ever seen the shuttlecock touch my racket. in that nano-second, a blink can be deadly to your game. it can make the difference between hitting the shuttlecock back to your opponent or it lying mockingly on the floor. someone should invent a device to keep the eyelids open during a game, perhaps a little like the thing dentist use to keep your mouth open for tooth extraction.

so, there you have it. i am not an inept player. there are just some contributory reasons causing me not to play at the very best.

are you convinced? no? well, i didn't think so.

12 comments:

Las montaƱas said...

pain here pain there.. nice weekend u have!

there are lots of gel in the pharmacy store for those kind of things.. should go check out mah!

aiyoh, the way you play badminton, I think Tun can do better! :P

go pick up golf lah, atleast it does not expose your agility or lack of it.

152cm? I'd love to see Ian standing next to u!

WHY said...

The damn shuttlecock doesnot drop right into your hand is not an excuse for your bad performance.No body will play the game standing still. Try to move everywhere to hit the shuttlecock.It is a kind of training of your reaction.

me said...

dear lm: yes, very 'funnnnn' indeed. i know about the gels but it doesn't work for me. it's a regular and hopeless thing for me.

tun can do better than me meh? but he cannot wiggle backside whilst playing like me mah. *blink blink*

i do play golf...erm, driving range only actually. but it exposes the lack of strength in my upper arm. that one also got lots of contributory factors. you want to hear about them? *grins*

157, or rather 156.5 to be exact. i think i shrinked 0.5 after child-birth :-). yes, i am soooooooo looking forward to stand next to that tall lamp post to crane my neck further! maybe he can be my rain pre-warning indicator. he will get wet long before i do. but don't forget, we women get the benefit of extremely highhhh heels.

dear why: i ran what! but there is time delay between the thought and reaction. by the time i reached the spot, the shuttlecock has landed. and very difficult to run when your legs are ready to give out.

Wuching said...

gargle with listerine everyday after brushing twice a day & u'll get less mouth ulcers significantly..like me!

Anonymous said...

I'm a tiny whiny itsy bitsy better in badminton than youlah, i.e. not as close to gravity mar. Lol

me said...

dear wuching: forgot to mention mouth ulcer from being too greedy. devouring my bowl of instant noodle to quickly, hence accidentally biting my tongue. ouch! inevitable.

me said...

dear imd: hehe. means you are taller har? makes a lot of difference you know. the closer to earth's gravity, the stronger the pull mah. so banyak difficult to run. kekeke.

ladybug said...

Hope you get better from the pain you've been feeling recently. I'm glad though that you played badminton once more. Me, I play for leisure nowadays. It's a fun game and a good workout for the body. :-D

ah pek said...

If you take away the shuttle, and just play the last word, I am sure you would do much, much better. Maybe even cure your mouth ulcers!

me said...

dear ladybug: i am so humbled by your visit to my blog merely by the mention of my inadequacy in badminton. thank you for dropping by. what i play can hardly be called badminton, when contrasted to what your husband and yourself. anyway, it is indeed an enjoyable workout for me and all.

dear ah pek: you banyak imaginative har. liddat also can turn into your senget thought. oral with ulcer??? kakakaka. can you imagine banana with peeling flesh and ulcers everywhere? eurgh! quick quick. censore further comments for suitability of public viewing.

ian said...

One thing you'll be glad to stand next to me in an open area is, when lightning strikes, it'll most porbably zap me into charcoal first...

me said...

dear ian: kakakakaka. good point. yes, you will indeed come in handy when i see lightning flashing *make mental note to call ian out when i go golfing*

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