my invisible newspaper man sends me a bill every month for my papers. a bill which i sometimes overlook to pay on time....*head hanging low with shame*...but, that's beside the point.
along with his bill, he sends me a self-addressed and pre-stamped envelope for my convenience in sending the cheques (cheque! not smelly coins and crumpled old notes anymore! ) back to him. his invoices are numbered and computer-generated (or prepared by computer at the very least). doesn't it just amazes you (or am i the only old rock here?) how far the little roadside newspaper delivery system has evolved? i think he has managed to corporatise the entire dailies' delivery system. i wouldn't be surprised if this guy is a hidden tycoon. i don't know how he does it by charging us only $5 delivery fees, when customers like me keep paying him late and forking out the extra 30sen for the stamps each month. still, i believe he's got something going here.
and another thing. you know those monthly bills he send? he includes an inspirational phrase in each invoice. last month's was 'satisfaction is in the effort, not in the attainment'. before that was 'instruments of the wise - circumstances are the rulers of the weak; they are but the instruments of the wise'. that is so profound, even i don't get it. i won't be surprised if the man behind this, mr r., is a harvard graduate!! i'll bet it's all a ploy to get us looking forward to his next bill!
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before you proceed, let me warn visitors that they may find today's posting a little crass, if not weird. hello everybody. are you all w...
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i'm back. yes, that is pretty obvious, otherwise you wouldn't be reading this. i brought back souveniers, dear readers, to compensat...
6 comments:
why dun u pay him a little extra just becoz u like his service, i'm sure he'll appreciate it very much.
as long as you pay... i think he doesnt really care... does he?
Maybe he has a professional receipt publisher. HA HA HA (Don't mind me, I'm stoned, it's Friday)
Next month, his so called inspirational phrase will be 'prompt payment ensures uniterrrupted delivery'
dear wuching: with this guy's computerised system, it doesn't work that way. if you pay extra, it'll just get credited into your account to be deducted in the future. *shrugs*
dear zewt: i think he'll care plenty when i pay him late. for all i know, he's poking pins into a voodoo doll now.
dear jonzz: is that like a professional novel publisher? u think macmillan will do it? or harper collins? don't worry, i'm as stoned as you are. it's friday!!!! we should partttttyyyyyy!
dear licky: gasp!!! you're mr r., aren't you?!?!?! i just received his next bill and that's EXACTLY what was written on it!!!
just kidding.
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