Tuesday, March 04, 2008

a letter to mr. isaac newton

to: mr isaac newton
from: me
date: 3rd march 2008
subject: laws of motion


dear mr newton,


i will like to bring your attention to two more laws of motion that you have inadvertently left out.

fourth law of motion: states that an object, namely a moving vehicle, in front of you tends to move at a slower speed in relation to yourself, ie, the object behind. the operator of the moving vehicle in front will be referred to as 'idiot', 'stupid' or other names that you may find appropriate.

fifth law of motion: states that an object, namely a moving vehicle, behind you tends to move at a relatively faster speed than yourself, ie the object in front. the operator of the moving vehicle behind shall be referred to as, and this is quite a long name, 'rushing-for-reincarnation' or 'stop-tailgating me, stalker!'. one important point to note, this does not, i repeat NOT, make you, the object in front, be referred to in the above context, ie. stupid or idiot. conversely, when the fourth law of motion is in effect, you are not to be referred to as the tailgater. the law is only applied to the 2nd party involved and never yourself.

mr newton, please kindly make changes to your 3 laws of motion with immediate effect. it is imperative that scientists, students and all professionals be aware of these new discoveries, which can have gargantuan effect on life as we know it.

thank you and best regards,

prof. me
s.s.i.b., i.c.c.l.
(society of the super intelligent bloggers, institute for the cute, clever lengluis)

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Me,

Women should not drive. Period.

Anonymous said...

Mr. Newton oledi died liao, if you wanna speak to him you're gonna need a medium like that 'i see dead people' boy leh!

Anonymous said...

Dear Me aka Lenglui,

Like my hubby said, Women should not be involved in anything that provides motion on four wheels.

Please don't disturb my hubby anymore and let him rest in peace.

Anonymous said...

Dear Me,

Here's a short tip on physics.
A body in motion tends to stay in motion.
A body at rest tends to stay at rest.
Now...that explains those cellulite of yours!
Hit the treadmills for god's sake!

me said...

what lah!! suddenly this post evokes all those ghost spirits. choi! choi!

dear mr newton: women period, i understand. women don't drive, period? period that time cannot drive issit??

dear wuchy: u cannot see all his spirit, and his wife one also, come up from the grave to talk to me mehhhhh! read the comment above and below yours!!

dear mrs newton: relax, sister. this one exchanging ideas between brilliant minds sahaja. if women don't drive, yr husband's invention chup lup lohhhhh! yr husband how to have peace, with you ngam ngam charm charm beside him liddat?!

dear newton's spirit: u frequent visitor to this blog, huh? i very attached to my cellulite leh. we go way back, you know. got feelings, got l..o...v..e. why must i exercise to get rid of it?? where i go, my cellulite goes!!

Anonymous said...

guys, guys! *excited*
u noe wat? mr newton just called me!
*bated breath*
and he said OKAY!
*cheers*

me said...

dear anon: mr. newton called u??! *raise eyebrow* i'm seriously worried about you. either you have to go see a psychiatrist now!! or go see one of those exorcist expert. good luck!

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