a friend asked me for a favour today that reminded me of what i am. unconsciously i have made a distinct separation between what i am and who i am. when your life is thus complicated you end up sounding like someone with split personality.

i try not to take offence. perhaps there is none to be taken. i don't know, i'm not sure. i don't have anyone to tell me that i shouldn't be feeling this way, that this is still considered normal. sometimes being what i am takes a toll on the spirit. it has it's perks, no doubt about it, but it's not as glorious and wonderful as everybody perceives.

it jars me slightly to be reminded of what i am. the last few weeks have been a beautiful escape from reality. i was who i am, not what i am. life was simple. escape is always transient