sometimes i don't get it. i can still see her name printed in black and white. i can still see her signature in my hands. the ink looks so black and fresh, like it was just signed yesterday. i can just imagine her hunched over her desk signing these, one paper at a time. how can someone that feels so near be gone forever from the face of the earth? how can something that is still so vivid in my hands and mind vaporise from the world, never ever to be heard from or seen again for time eternal? i don't get it.