Friday, July 06, 2007

a break

a break in my routine today. just in time too because i am beginning to feel the symptoms of a burnt-out. one day. one day to stop and slow down, to sit down and let my thoughts wander once more. one day to not having to think of what to eat, what to cook, what to do next. que sera sera. there should be more 'one-days'.

given one day off, i've always thought that i would pick up on where i was rudely interrupted by the boss slaming documents down on my table and flitter my day shopping...but now, sitting quietly behind the desk, soft music filling the air seems more like what i need now.

ahhhhhhhhh......*stretching hands over head*.

we always seem to get into the vicious cycle of writing for others. perhaps it's not a bad thing because everybody seeks acknowledgement, recognition but somewhere along the line, we forget what we want to write about. my thoughts. a very random and boring process, but nevertheless, something that releases my trapped soul and let my mind soar when the body can't. such a therapeutic process for me.

sometimes you blog as part of a social process, to bring yourself and your readers closer with the fun and laughters. i've been too tired of late to blog of my thoughts.....simply because i've been too tired to let the cogs in my mind turn. i've simply filled the empty pages with random clips of my life and short stories.

sometimes there are stories untold of the events in my life, eventhough purportedly the blog is about me, some words left unspoken, some thoughts unexpressed. simply because we fear. fear of offending, fear of boring others, fear of giving out too much information, fear of what others' think, fear of so many things. maybe the beauty of a child is in the absence of such fear.

so many factors, so many influences....why do we always let other things sway us? one thing that i should have learnt with age, but perhaps have not yet perfected, is to stand tall.

note: there was an interruption in the midst of writing....and when i come back...the feeling's not there anymore..making the continuing of the post a little emptier. life is strange.

5 comments:

Jonzz said...

Hmm, somebody interrupted your rhythm ... Hate it when that happens.

That's why I usually start writing when I have the ideas already consolidated in my head.

Anonymous said...

Go read For One More Day.

zewt said...

i think you're suddenly experiencing a sudden surge of self discovery?

we all blog for different reason. but i do agree the part about getting closer with readers. i think it's a trap all bloggers should avoid.

Anonymous said...

What a miserable experience!
Fear no more, just pour out the things you have so long stashed inside.
You definitely will feel better, at least temporarily.

me said...

dear jozz: ya! tell me about it!

sometimes i like to just go where my heart and thoughts bring me.

dear e: mitch albom? is it good? i read tuesdays...and didn't like it. 5 people was better. since u recommended, i'll get it the next time i pop into a bookshop.

dear zewt: sudden surge? nahhhh, it has always been ongoing. though it's true, it still sounds strange. avoid getting closer with your readers....sound a little cold too. should i be avoiding you? haha.

dear licky: you sound like my therapist. *looks around* so, where's the couch that i can lie on? none??!?!!! you fake!

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